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Dick in a Box
Dick in a Box is a crazed man who believes that all fun is a source of evil, anti-hedonistic for all you people who get boners at big words. His goal is to destroy all fun in the world, no mater what, even if it leads to his own demise. On this grounds he has had more then one run in with Rebecca Black, who he believes preaches the evils of fun all too enthusiasticly. Origins Richard Andrew Box was born in a suburb outside of Warwick, Rhode Island in 1988( 23 years old). His father was a small time journalist for the Warwick news paper, and his mother served as an elementry school nurse. Richard grew up with a small circle of friends but still felt lonely, his closest friend was his older brother Edward J Box. Richard was an above average student. Nothing amazing but it was clear he had a bright future.....OR SO THEY THOUGHT!!! *subtle foreshadowing*. He lived his life the same as you or me, until the summer of 2005. On July 23rd 2005 Edward Box died in a car crash caused by drinking and driving, he was the only one who died out of 4 people in the car(so apparently this is the wussyest drinking while driving crash ever, bitch can't even kill 2 people). A miniature memorial was placed at the tree where they crashed, and a funural service was held. At the funeral, the friends of Edward tried to console Richard(then 17 years old) by saying that his brother "Went out having fun". Something must've happened that day. He swore off fun, seeing it as the cause of his brother's death. He developed a stauchly anti-hedonistic lifestyle, to the point where he would go out of his was to end other peoples fun, thinking he was saving them. Over time, this idea turned him into a serial killer. He developed the persona of "Dick In A Box" after the SNL skit which he believed to show the proper way to end people having fun(imprisonment) however he took it a step further....he brutally murders them *lighting bolt and dramatic organ playing*. Today Today, Dick is roaming the world bringing an end to fun any way he can. There is the occational sighting of him looking for a victim. He has a blood lust for Rebecca Black that has yet to be sated, dispite numerous assasination attempts, the most famous of which was an intentional car crash where he aimed to push a car Rebecca was in off a cliff in the city of Still Water. If you see him, scowl, if you frown all the time, smile, the pain will be over soon.... Personality Dispite his numerous murders and crime, there are many sightings of him crying after a kill. This may be because he is a moral person deep down, and he is doing what makes him the least happy of all, murder thumb|left|390px|The song of his life